An elderly couple had been married for 50 years. Every single morning, without fail, the husband would let out a massive fart as soon as he got out of bed—and then laugh like a maniac.
Every time, his wife would shake her head and say, “One of these days, you’re going to fart your guts out.”
It was Thanksgiving morning. The old man was still sleeping in while the wife began preparing the turkey. She had an idea. Grinning, she tiptoed up to their bedroom, grabbed a handful of turkey innards, and snuck them into her husband’s underwear waistband.
An hour later, she hears him waking up. His usual morning routine followed: feet hitting the floor, then the loud fart and maniacal laugh. But this time, the laugh suddenly stopped, followed by a loud scream, and then—nothing. Complete silence for 10 minutes.
Finally, the husband comes downstairs and says to his wife, “Honey, I owe you an apology. For years, you’ve been telling me I was going to fart my guts out. Well, today it finally happened. But by the grace of God and these two fingers (holds up his soiled first and second fingers), I got ’em all back in and I’m gonna be okay.”
😂😂
Camping and Stolen Tents: A Lesson in Perspective
An old married couple decided to go camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and soon drifted off to sleep.
In the middle of the night, the wife nudged her husband awake and said, “Look at the stars and tell me what you see.”
The husband replied, “I see millions and millions of stars.”
She asked, “And what do you make of that?”
He thought for a second, then said, “Well, if there are millions of stars, and some of them have planets, it’s quite likely there are planets out there like Earth. And if there are planets like Earth, there might be life out there too.”
There was a brief pause, and then the wife replied, “No, honey, it means somebody stole our tent!”
😂
I hope these jokes brought a big smile to your face today! Have a fantastic day!
